Single Shots
by Arafel
Summary: Trigun drabbles. Quick, easy, no preparation time required.
1. Fifty

  


Fifty

Fifty derringers lay in fifty different places, the price for not reloading.

"Sempai? Have you found them all yet?"

"Keep looking."

Two by the sheriff's office, one under the thomas trough, one caught in tumbleweeds.

Thirty. Thirty-one.

"Still looking, insurance girls? Maybe you should try carrying one gun with fifty bullets rather than fifty guns with one bullet."

"Shut up, Broom Boy."

Forty-seven. Forty-eight. Forty-nine.

"Where's the last one?"

"Sempai, I can't find it!"

A slip of silver from beneath a red sleeve goes unnoticed. A wrists twists, and silver lies in black leather.

"I found your gun, insurance girl."   



	2. Payback

  


Payback

The halls of the sand steamer were emptier than they had been before. Vash knew why – a tiny derringer pointed at the throat of the leader of the Bad Lands Gang.

Vash couldn't believe it. He, the feared outlaw, destroyer of cities and untrustworthy criminal, owed his life to the insurance girl.

That annoying, bitchy, persistent short girl had ambushed BDN with the oldest ruse in the book –

And now he owed her one. 

He had to pay her back. It grated him to be in debt to someone so irritating.

And yet – 

Wouldn't he have done the same?

Damn.   
  



	3. Premonition

  


Premonition

The captain knew he was out of place in the nursery, but the situation demanded regular visits.

"Rem, how are the twins doing?"

She stood between high chairs, feeding two blond babies. "Two months and they eat solid food. They wanted to try my doughnut. Vash really likes it."

"They're growing so fast." Joey was amazed. "Could you have a look at this data for me?"

"Sure." Rem walked over to examine the printout. Abandoned, one of the boys wailed.

"Is he all right?"

Rem picked up the crying boy. "Vash has separation anxiety." She smiled. "He'll get over it."  



	4. Naked

  


Naked

Two bodies, coiled in the sheets. The night was still young.

"But…" Meryl blushed.

"But what?" Vash coaxed. "You can do it. For me. We've been together for a while now and you've never taken them off."

She traced a nervous pattern on the sheet. "...I feel so naked without them." 

"It's a little late to be worried about that." Vash kissed her ear. "It's easy. First one, then the other..."

"Can't we just leave them on?" Her voice was pleading. 

"No. It's time to go all the way." Vash was firm.

Meryl sighed and handed Vash her earrings.   



	5. Question

  


Question

Because she is who she is, and because she knows she can, she likes to ask the question. It's not a question she's supposed to ask, but she asks it anyway.

"When did you know that you loved me?"

Because he is who he is, and because he loves her, he lets her. The truth is always relative, and the answer he gives is by no means untrue. 

"I always have."   
  



	6. Playing by the Rules

  


Playing by the Rules

The banging on his door would wake the dead. Hung-over, Wolfwood answered it.

Vash's pants were undone. Meryl's shirt, the same. What the hell?

"...Tongari?"

"We need you to marry us," said Vash. "Right now."

"...Why?"

"Not till we're married." Meryl was firm. "You're a minister."

Nonplussed, Wolfwood scratched his head. "Um... Do you?"

"Yes."

"Do _you?_"

"Oh, yes."

"Okay, you're married." The newlyweds grinned and left.

Soon, the thumping on the wall was enough to wake the dead. Wolfwood groaned and left the room, to find Milly in the hall.

"You either, Big Girl?"

"Mr. Priest, let's get married!"  



	7. Strange Relations

  


Strange Relations

It was traditional to meet the family post-engagement, and Vash found he liked the Stryfes. One was missing, though.

"Where's my brother?"

Her mother pointed. "He's outside."

Meryl bounded ahead of Vash out the back door. "Bro! Meet my fiancé!" Vash followed, and blinked.

Her brother was a little taller and enhanced in height by outrageous blond spikes of hair. And even if the red coat had made Vash stand out, purple stretch jumpsuits were stranger. Nothing stood up to the huge broad-bladed sword propped against the fence. 

Meryl smiled. "Vash, this is my brother, Cloud."   
  



	8. Hope Springs Eternal

  


Hope Springs Eternal

"Did it hurt?"

"What?" replied the woman at the bar.

"When you fell out of heaven?"

A resounding slap later, Vash was moping into his drink. Meryl couldn't believe it. Who used those cheesy lines?

Another lady got up to leave. Vash perked up. "Aren't you forgetting something?"

"What?"

"Me!"

Milly leaned over. "Wow, that's the third drink in his face tonight."

"They did warn us that Vash was a womanizer." Meryl shook her head. "But..."

"Hello, I'm an outlaw, and I'm here to steal your heart!"

Meryl stared in disbelief. "...he really is the _worst_ womanizer I've ever seen."   



	9. Broken

  


Broken  


Wishful thinking only made the truth more painful, she had once told Milly. 

The object of her affection was friendly with her, to be sure, but more so with the priest. 

And even though Meryl assured herself that Vash and Wolfwood were simply closer friends than most, there was something in their relationship that suggested that though they held themselves apart during the day, they might not at night. 

Now, she knew – an empty bed, a flash of red in the hallway before Wolfwood's door closed. 

Reality was bitter, and the wish hurt more than ever.


	10. Playing DressUp

  


Playing Dress-Up  


Jakey of Mai City knew who he wanted to be for Halloween. 

"Vash the Stampede!" he told his mother, pointing to the "Wanted" poster in the post office. 

She found a remnant at the general store, and a miniature trademark red coat was ready just in time. 

"Take your brother along," she admonished, adjusting her eldest's sunglasses. "That was the deal. He can be Vash's sidekick." 

"Mom, Vash doesn't have a sidekick!" 

"Yes, he does." 

A cardboard cross and his Sunday best later, Tommy was ready. 

Jakey scowled. "The priest didn't win the Quick Draw contest, anyway." 

Tommy smiled. "Tied."


	11. Love at First Sight

  


Love at First Sight  


Rem had never expected to be doing something trashy to get herself through grad school. Still, long legs and long hair made her a success at the strip club. And a lot of money fit into her skimpy G-string. 

The men weren't allowed to touch her – as if she would have let them. But tonight, there was a sweet face in the crowd, watching her like she was a person and not a piece of meat. 

Afterwards, she saw him outside, and stopped under the glare of the streetlights as he approached her. 

"My name's Alex. What's yours?" 


	12. Premature

  


Premature  


Next to Meryl's hospital bed, Vash holds his newborn daughter. 

Even at six months, she is perfect. Ten tiny fingers, ten tiny toes, and the merest ghost of honey-gold hair. 

Meryl lies still and pale in the bed, almost the color of the hospital linens, her breathing weak and shallow. The orderlies have cleared off the reddened sheets, and her vitals are stable, but he fears what will happen when she wakes. 

So small. So beautiful. So cold. 

Doc approaches Vash, and his voice is infinitely sorrowful but final. 

"Vash, it's time to let her go now." 


	13. Not in the Service Manual

  


Not in the Service Manual  


The priest knew what the gunman was up to when he walked into the garage again. 

Wolfwood had been trying to fix the damned motorcycle all day, but every time he opened the guts of the engine, he got distracted. 

Gauging by the long fingers trailing down his back, the distraction was back. 

"I thought you said you'd be done in an hour." Vash's breath warmed his ear. 

"Not yet." 

"Can't you repair this thing? I've come back three times to check on you…" 

With the last of his self-control, Wolfwood growled, "I could finish if you'd stop _kissing_ me!" 


	14. The Eternal Question

The Eternal Question

The twins still wanted to be read to – a comfort before bedtime. Rem tailored stories to their intelligences, but they could be as exasperating as any true six-year-old. 

"Finish! Or we won't go to sleep," Vash threatened. "Please?" he amended. 

Exhausted, Rem stared at the boys. "You said that last page." 

"The suspense," Knives said. "You can't stop now." 

Rem sighed and read on. 

"Which came out of the opened door,--the lady, or the tiger?" she finished. 

"The lady!" Vash sang. 

"What do you think, Knives?" 

Knives smiled, imagining bright stripes and flashing claws. "He got what he deserved."


	15. Got A Light?

Got A Light?

Milly had scolded Wolfwood more times than she could count for smoking. 

It was bad for him, she warned, and he should quit. Every time Milly wagged her finger, Wolfwood would smile and joke, or buy her pudding as a distraction. 

The smell of smoke was on Wolfwood, always. Now, as he kissed her, she found that the taste on his tongue was not unpleasant - it was so _him_, and she was drowning in it. 

Later, as she stifled moans into her shoulder, she considered that an oral fixation might have its uses, after all.


	16. Proposal

Proposal

Teatime in the NeoNevada Gardens Inn. Two companions, seated, sipping Ceylon tea in the deserted common room. Two strides, one long and one short, echoing with purpose down opposite hallways – ever closer. 

Vash blanched. "They found out," he said, and bolted. 

Meryl and Wolfwood stood in the doorways, fuming. 

"You!" 

_"You!"_

"Short, pushy, frustrated, nosy little pest – " 

"Chest-baring Bible-quoting manwhore – " 

In unison: "Keep your damn hands off of Vash!" 

Skip a beat, teacup down. "There is another option," Milly suggested. 

Meryl glared. "He finds some baby oil?" 

Wolfwood scowled. "She buys a vibrator?" 

Milly smiled. "We all swing."


	17. Upgrade

Upgrade

"Are you sure you don't want another machine gun installed?" Doc paused over Vash's mechanical arm, soldering tool poised in midair. 

"Very sure." 

"Hm." Doc considered, hiding a grin. "Let me try something…" 

"What did he do?" Meryl poked at the interlace of synthflesh and metal. 

Vash shook his head. "I'm not sure. He said you'd like it, though." 

Her curious fingers found a depression near his elbow, and a tiny click sounded. Vash's fingers began to buzz, and he yelped in surprise, An enormous grin spread across Meryl's face. 

"So that's what Doc meant about a 'secret weapon.'"


End file.
